Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize