How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
