I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
and i looked up. we had an audience...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
