i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
