YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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