I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
