Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
