And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
