The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
