She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
