So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
