kristin has been a bad kristin
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
