she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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