therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize