I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
