So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
