Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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