Define "chronic" masturbator.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
