I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
