I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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