Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Randomize
