I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
How naked do you want me to be?
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