I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
