Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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