We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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