So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
