I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just had sex on a roof
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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