He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
