I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
