it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize