Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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