So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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