Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
