; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Randomize
