My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
my poor anus
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
