Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
