Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Everything about him screamed your future.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
