That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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