I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
