Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
