Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
So many bounce houses so little time
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
