You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
