haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
