Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
