i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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