That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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