So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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