brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
