idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize