I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
